Where do I begin?

With the world opinion being what is today, one would assume something like this could only happen in America.

But leave it to someone in England to actually get his penis stuck in a stainless steel pipe.

It just goes to show you that you don't have to live in Arkansas to be a crazy redneck pervert.

Now, the story doesn't tell us exactly why the man decided to put his junk in a pipe, so that leaves it up to us to come up with creative reasons. Since there's no photo of the man in question, I can only assume he is horribly ugly. So ugly that only a section of plumber's material would have him.

But the part of the story I found most intruiging was the quote at the end of the article.

"I've only come across this type of thing three or four times in my 17 years as a firefighter," said Greg Garrett, Redbridge fire station watch manager. "It's not a daily occurrence."

Well I should hope not! But what are they doing over in England that this sort of thing happens once every four years or so? I've been on this planet for 30 years and this is the first time I've heard of someone having to get his private parts cut out of a steel tube with construction hardware. I would have thought the watch manager would have said he'd never heard of something like this, either.

But four times in his 17-year career? Yikes. British folk must be uglier than I initially thought.